Today's Feelings (physical and emotional)

I am feeling pretty well today, considering I got almost no sleep last night. I am sure the lack of sleep will slam me later today or in the morning, but I am thankful that I am feeling well otherwise. It is the first day since even before the BFP that I have not felt sick to my stomach and ravenous all at once. I am also not feeling bloated and my breasts hurt (a little) less than usual. I will take it!

I have been thinking a lot about working and being a mom. I am still not sure how anyone does it and feels that they are doing a good job as an employee or as a mother, but it seems to work and I am sure it will for me, too. DH will ask from time-to-time if I want to move. When he asked last night, I answered, "Sometimes." I know, though, that staying home would not work for me. So much of who I am is in my career and I have worked hard to get where I am. Sine a happy, fulfilled mommy makes a happy, fulfilled baby, I know I will be a career mom and I am okay with that. DH and I will figure it out.

We are telling my in-laws this weekend. We are not using as much pomp and circumstance surrounding the reveal, but I know it will be special nonetheless. We are also telling close friends this weekend. It is getting more real by the day... and my daily calendar says baby is one inch long! Keep growing, little one!

A working babymamagonnabe in awe

This whole experience is truly amazing. There is a little person growing inside of me. I just repeat that to myself over and over again and I think our little one is already making me a better person. I start to get stressed and I think of the little one and try to calm down. The smile that inevitably crosses my face instantly enhances my mood. I get irritated with some other driver in traffic and same thing. Baby just makes other things in life seem so insignificant. DH and I have made a life (with God's help, of course) and we are going to be parents. I know that being a mom will be the most important job I have ever held.

Work. The idea of balancing work and family gets a little more complicated when I think of baby. I am very worried about being a good enough mom and still performing well at work. Last night was a late work night and I was hungry and exhausted. I just wanted to go home and eat and sleep, but I was stuck. I was in tears as I left the building because I was thinking, "How am I going to be a good mom when I do not know if I will be able to leave work on time on any given day?"

After talking it all over with DH upon my arrival home, though, I realized that I will make it work because I will also have him to help. I do not have to do it all, at least not all of the time. I also think I am overreacting to the whole thing because I am still hyper-emotional right now. The first ultrasound is in two days. We cannot wait to see the picture of our growing baby and I just know that sight will give me some perspective.